3 Ways To Set Boundaries To Make You A Better Friend
As daunting as it can seem, learning how to successfully set clear boundaries with your friends is important. While this may seem counterintuitive, it makes you a better friend. Everyone thinks, ‘Oh, a boundary means me setting limits, creating distance. Actually, boundaries are the best way to create closeness and connection, Allison Perks, psychotherapist. By communicating with friends about what’s OK and what isn’t, you can create trust in the friendship. The path to better boundaries — and better friendships — begins with three simple steps. 1. Communicate. It's best to start that boundary-setting conversation as early as possible. It’s also helpful if the boundary-setting request is framed as confrontational. 2. Compromise. Sometimes getting a boundary set in a way that preserves the friendship means compromising. Sometimes we each have to give up exactly what we want in order to bridge the gap and come closer to the middle — if it’s at all possible, James Guay, therapist. 3. Reevaluate. Because our friendships change as we move through life, we shouldn’t expect the boundaries we set to be unchanging. [T]here’s an opportunity for promotion or demotion between those levels. That’s not necessarily a negative thing, Reshana Watson, therapist.